Tuesday, June 21, 2011



Really love this quote.  It begins - "You don't have to be pretty - you don't owe prettiness to anyone..." 

I'd never realised, till very lately, the actual ugly oppressive weight of the word pretty. I thought, when I first found the size acceptance movement and encountered my very first fat admirers, that I had found home.  The longer I stayed and played and read and learned though the more and more I saw that this was a space that, again, came with some very ugly hypocrisy.  Drama about feeders and feedees aside, about sexual fetish, about waste and desperation and actual mental illness and social dysfunction aside, the sexual fatosphere is where I learnt absolutely the ugly lessons of 'Pretty.' 

For years I knew pretty was not me.  I was short and fat and very dark and this was not at all conceivably pretty.  In the sexual fatosphere those lessons were, ironically, even more deeply ingrained. In the fat world you can be the wrong kind of fat.  If you fat is not attached to your boobs and bum its the 'wrong' kind of fat.  Fat girls who are not hourglass or pear shaped are routinely told my 'fat admirers' to try to lose weight.  If you have a fat belly you are called an ugly blob, misshapen, ugly - all this within the fat movement.  It was almost funny to find that I had run from a space I thought I was rejected to one where again I did not measure up.  I often wander if I was light skinned, hour glassed and just generally less loud mouthed if I would keep swallowing the lies of pretty - if they wouldn't sting as badly because I fit.  I can't know so I move forward with what I have, with what I've seen and I've learnt.  What a crazy ramble lol! This youtube vid expresses this far better than I have.



  1. Hey luv I didnt know you followed my blog, than you!!! I added you to my blog list as well