Soaking up the Love

The last post was gloomy and I cannot leave it at that because there is goodness too – so much joy in my life.  I cannot end leave this blog just lost in anger.  I’ve been home for 3 weeks spending time with my niece and nephew and my parents and it has been amazing.  My babies are so beautiful.  There is pure joy in the spirits of children and I’ve soaked up their happiness and their generous love and I am so thankful – so, so thankful – to have the family I have and the love I have in my life.  And now for pictures!!! :D

The Breath before the Plunge

I am very good at leeching the joy out of my own life LOL! I get obsessive and competitive and I worry and worry and worry and eventually, the things I love, are no longer fun.  I've managed to make myself ill - my eczema is as bad as it was in late 2006 and I need to fix and to fix it I need to sort out the emotional tangle that keeps tying me up in knots.  So yes  - a deep, deep breath before the plunge into joy.

Joy

Do you ever get the feeling that life is so blindingly, almost hurtfully beautiful, it’s like staring into the sun its so overwhelming, and you can’t keep looking at it. That’s how I feel today. Woke up really cranky cos I keep having these amazing dreams – amazing where I’m doing a job I love, in a phenomenal relationship, flying without wings and chowing down on ambrosia on the regular. This is very much not reality – but still – life is just so good. It’s sharp, like a gleaming blade. Every moment is jagged and raw and sometimes too much to take. Sour, hot, blinding, lush, thick and just … good.